Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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