you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Randomize
