I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
