it hurts more in the daytime
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
