i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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