Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
