vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Alive.
So much puke
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
