so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
PANTIES FOUND
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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