There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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