I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i drank out of a bidet.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Everclear isn't food dammit
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
