so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
