Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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