You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Hippo gnu deer
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
