Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
