We won't sleep together?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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