Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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