it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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