I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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