How'd it feel making her break her religion?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
