But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Randomize
