i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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