you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
