i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
