ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
