so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
