chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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