Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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