Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Randomize
