Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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