Where did you get a picture of my penis
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
