Rock
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Fuck
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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