they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
