we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
