he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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