I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
