did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
