so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
