I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
