will power is for people who don't want to get laid
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
