So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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