so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
