Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
