So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Someone came in the potted fern
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
