She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
