i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
