dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
3 2 1 whiskey
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
