well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
