do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
