I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
