why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
